Friday, December 27, 2013

Almaza Pilsner - Lebanon - 9/10/2011

The Low Down:
They should rename this beer "The Stank" because that is what it is now known as around the group at the barbecue at which I imbibed it. It smells... horrific, like a mixture of welding slag and cat litter and the taste doesn't come in much better.

Almaza (I capitalise because I care) is a Heineken owned mass produced swill that doesn't even have the common decency to taste like Heineken. They took Heineken and they removed all of the good, all of the joy, and all of the decency, leaving a satanic bile inducing turd of a beer.

Packaging: 3/10
The lack of capitalisation has my OCD raging.
Refreshment: 1/10
I drank this at a barbecue, in October, in Sydney, and could barely bring it to my lips.
Flavour 0/10:
I've never rated anything 0 before, that's because nothing has been quite as horrible as this. I was saving the 0 and this toilet water has earned it.
Alcohol Content: 1/10
4.2%. adding insult to injury, it's even low for a pilsner.
Price: 2/10
$3.00 seems OK, but some methylated spirits and orange juice is better value.
Total: 7/50

Burn it, burn it with fire, use napalm, WMD's, anything, just keep it away. Even the blogger layout tool hates this beer, for some reason the formatting kept resetting.