Taj Mahal Premium Lager - India 12-3-11

The Low Down:
When I fired up a spicy curry  tonight, I thought and hoped that this beer might complement it well. I wasn't mistaken, but I wasn't quite correct either.

It is incredibly full bodied for a lager, with rich roasted malt flavours and a trailing taste of hops that's not unpleasant, but not what I expected from the bottle.

Speaking of the bottle, the design is standard, but the drawing of the actual Taj Mahal saves it slightly. Beccy raised a good issue and asked why every beer brand needs a gold drop shadow.

This is a earthy and strong tasting beer, but without the alcohol content to back it up.

Packaging: 4/10
A little cramped with 85 different fonts on the bottle.
Refreshment: 6/10
A little too meaty for a lager, but still whets the whistle.
Flavour 7/10:
This is full of flavour, the maltiness is evident and pronounced there is a slight alcohol flavour, but it's subtle.
Alcohol Content: 4/10
4.5%. Tastes like this should be stronger, but at the same time, I'm glad it isn't.
Price: 8/10
$4.30. Once again, very respectable for a rare import from a country where Kingfisher dominates the market.
Total: 29/50

Conclusion: 
Heavy duty lager, with a very specific market. It did suit my curry well, though normally I would have matched it with a light and bubbly Asian style beer. Drink it with butter chicken or some Rogan Josh and you will be pleasantly surprised.
Cheers.

Delirium Tremens - Belgium - 12-3-11

The Low Down:
This beer is amazing. The pink elephants, walking alligators, dragons and tailed swans on the bottle, which is disguised as porcelain, make the delirium evident.

The fact that it is a strong, fruity Belgian ale, that tastes like nectar of the gods, and goes down easier than a midget porn star, also swings things in its favour.

Apparently family brewed since 1654, I want to know what these guys were smoking, and where I can get some. This is not the beer you want to have in hand when you spiral into the DT's (from which this beer takes its name, and is Latin for shaking frenzy).

P.S. The finish is burnt caramel, I figured I should talk about the beer rather than the concept at some point.

Packaging: 10/10
This beer is outrageous, in a good way.
Refreshment: 8/10
Surprisingly smooth for something with a mammoth amount of booze in it.
Flavour 9/10:
The alcohol flavour is less evident than you would expect, and the caramel finish after fruity and spicy waves is just divine.
Alcohol Content: 9/10
8.5%. Without being able to notice it. This is a sneaky, boozy beer.
Price: 8/10
$8.95. Belgian beers are always pricey, but they are held to a higher standard. Considering the quality of this beer, there is definite value here.
Total: 44/50

Conclusion:

This beer throws all caution to the wind, and talks about a real disease in a fun way. Yes alcohol withdrawal can cause the DT's, but this is a much nicer way to experience them. Drink this with some schnitzel, or crocodile, elephant, swan, or dragon.
Cheers.

Viking Pilsner Bjor - Iceland 12-3-11

The Low Down:
Made with the crushed souls of the eternal warriors of Valhalla, this beer is wonderful to imbibe. From the sleek Odin and Fenrir motif, to the delicious mild pilsner inside, this beer is excellent on every level.

More refreshing than an ice bath after a sauna, and just the right amount of hoppy flavour.

Considering the sun comes out for half a year at a time, the brown bottle is an obvious choice. The low-ish alcohol means you can drink it like an actual Viking; Fast, gleefully, and to excess.

This beer is actually made from melted glacier, and some of the water is over 200 years old. That's quite interesting (Thank you Stephen Fry).

Packaging: 9/10
Solar Protection, Odin motif, nothing it doesn't need. All the style it deserves.
Refreshment: 9/10
This is no mead. It goes down a treat. Glacial water is outrageously fresh.
Flavour 8/10:
Light hops, and that delicious "oh Gods I'm drinking a glacier" finish.
Alcohol Content: 6/10
4.4%. Matching the content of its Pilsner brethren, but with a little more style.
Price: 9/10
$4.50. Iceland is as far as you can go without coming back again. It is quite literally the other side of the world. This makes the price phenomenal.
Total: 41/50

Conclusion:
This beer is something you have to try, and since it is gaining popularity abroad, you should be able to. Drink it while pillaging the villages of Europe, or with a BBQ, or with some left over soup, or Pringles. It  probably also goes well with smoked herring.
Cheers

Pilsner Urquell - Czech Republic 11-3-11

The Low Down:
Once again apologies for the missing bottle cap, but this beer should need no cap-like introduction.

As you may already know, or at least expect, Plzen, where this beer is brewed, is the home of the Pilsner.

All I can say is that this beer has more hops than a Daft Punk discography. The Flavour is almost unique, as if they took the concept of Pilsner to the extreme. Since they have been brewing this since 1842, we can assume every other Pilsner has simply dulled down the flavour, and suffered for it.

Goes down hoppy with some citrus notes. Finishes like a bronco, with another slam of hops.



Packaging: 7/10
Gold and red is a classic on the light green bottle. the  addition of "The Original Pilsner" doesn't hurt.
Refreshment: 7/10
Despite everything this is refreshing and almost tangy.
Flavour 8/10:
Hoppity Hop the Hips and or Hops. This beer tastes like its ingredients, and they are delicious.
Alcohol Content: 4/10
4.4%. This is about what you would expect form the crem de la creme of Pilsners..
Price: 5/10
$7.50 lets face it. You could have spent more on an Italian drivel beer. 
Total: 31/50

Conclusion:
My eyes bugging out of my head is a testament to the true hoppiness of this beer. It will explode your brain. Drink it ice cold, and if you like hops, you are in for a treat.
Cheers.

Birra Peroni Nastro Azzurro - Italy - 11-3-11

The Low Down:
The real problem with my local is the fact that they steal the bottle caps when they serve you a beer. Hence the following pair are missing the cap picture. In the case of the Nastro Azzurro, that's not all that was missing.

Definition of any type seems to escape the "Nasty Azure."  It is generic, and by generic I mean bitter.

If I were in Italy and this came out complete with an amazing Mediterranean seafood feast, I probably wouldn't complain. As a standalone beer however, it isn't particularly good at anything.

Packaging: 4/10
The design of the bottle is a little bit mafia, a little bit pizza parlour. so Italian I guess.
Refreshment: 6/10
The Fizz level is about right, and it goes down smooth, mostly due to the lack of flavour apart from "light alcohol".
Flavour 2/10:
What flavour, the bitterness and booziness?
Alcohol Content: 4/10
5.1%. considering it has little else going for it, this could stand to see another half a percent.
Price: 3/10
$7.50 Your money is better spent elsewhere. Hopefully I find an impressive mafia Italian beer soon, so I don't go for a long walk off a short pier.
Total: 19/50

Conclusion:
Drink this with a plate full of calamari in delicious Neapolitan sauce. Or not at all.
Cheers

Grolsch - The Netherlands - 11-3-11

The Low Down:
Grolsch. I lived with some dutch people back in the early 2000's, and I probably have them to blame for my fond spot for this Dutch classic. It's smooth, it's fizzy, it's less hoppy than most European beer, and it's sweet on the finish.

You might think that it tastes like tulips, and it does have a floral aroma, but that's mostly down to the quality and age of the hops.


The greatest thing about Grolsch, which is technically a Pilsner is its amazing bottle design. The use of the beugel top, means no bottle opener is required, and adds an elegant flair.

Packaging: 10/10
The beugel top makes this the best designed beer in the world. It becomes a plaything while you drink.
Refreshment: 8/10
Very smooth, very quick to go down. Nice Fizz accompanying something that's both refreshing and energising
Flavour 8/10:
Since this is technically a Pilsiner, the flavour it possesses is truly amazing.
Alcohol Content: 7/10
5.0%. exactly what you might expect for a beer that is the 21st most consumed world-wide.
Price: 5/10
$8.00 This was admittedly out and about at our local, but its not terrifying for an import beer.
Total: 40/50

Conclusion:
A very very good beer, from a country that makes excellent beers anyway. The fact that this beer shares 15% of the market share behind Heineken in The Netherlands, speaks volumes. Drink it when you fear spilling your beer, or anytime really. 
Cheers

Baltika #8 - Russia 11-3-11

The Low Down:
I have a weak spot for Hefeweizens (wheat beer) and this one is pretty damn good. It's the first import I've reviewed in a 500ml bottle, and what a bottle it is. Spouting the glory of mother Russia with clean branding and embossed relief.

Number 4 is the lager, number 6 is the porter, there are many of these, each different, but all the same. the brewer takes the marxist concept even further as there is nothing apart from the 8 to even identify this bear as the heff.

The taste however, is not remotely socialist, and flavours of freedom, pineapple, and other fruits abound.

Packaging: 9/10
Socialism in design. Have you ever seen a brick building in Magadan? Elegant in simplicity
Refreshment: 9/10
An amazing example of the effervescence that should exist in a good heff.
Flavour 7/10:
Fruity and wheaty without overly pronounced hops.
Alcohol Content: 7/10
5.0%. A solid score for a heff. Because it comes in a pint, it's more than enough.
Price: 6/10
$5.29 seems a bit high for a heff, but it is imported. I suppose that's what you get for letting the workers control the means of production.
Total: 38/50

Conclusion:
a perfectly permissible heff, really great flavour and design. Additionally, since it's from Russia, you can drink it while talking in a thick Bond villain accent.
Cheers

Zeitgeist - Scotland 11-3-11

The Low Down:
I walked into Vintage Cellars looking for a different beer to review today, which I found, when this jumped out at me. A purple and white bottle oozing sex.

Opening it up, does not let that sex escape. Instead the amazingly delicious aromas, of coffee and chocolate sugar, stay in the bottle.
The device by which you deliver these amazing flavours to your face, is elegant and clever, while feeling very much how "zeitgeist" should.

"We do not merely aspire to the proclaimed heady heights of conformity through neutrality and blandness."

Ok that's confusing, but what isn't confusing is the price. AU$1.50

Packaging: 9/10
The importers stamp is the only imperfection on the amazing artwork by Heather Brennan.
Refreshment: 7/10
It's a black lager, whatever that is. It's not refreshing nor comforting; It's something else entirely. It is really fizzy though!
Flavour 9/10:
It is amazingly full of flavour, strong bitterness and aroma.
Alcohol Content: 6/10
4.9%. I have no idea what content a black lager is supposed to have. With that said, it tastes like it could be stronger.
Price: 10/10
$1.50 Beer. For the people by the people.
Total: 41/50

Conclusion:
It's cheap, full of flavour, and very pretty to hold. Lacking the alcohol content of other beers I could compare it to seems to be its only real downfall.
Cheers

Gage Road Sleeping Giant Indian Pale Ale - Australia - 11-3-11

The Low Down:
The second Beer we enjoyed with our lunch-time pizza was a Western Australian IPA.

The First time I drank Gage Roads was the lager, at a friends 18th Birthday party, however this IPA is a different beast. Very dry and crisp with a hoppy floral finish.

Another beer matched well to Pizza (are there any that aren't?).

The tagline reads "Knock the top off this sleeping giant and awaken the taste within" and it's not far from the mark. Inside is a bold beer that has many subtle flavours under the initial dry ale flavour.

Packaging: 7/10
Orange is my favourite colour. The earthy tones match the hop flavour inside.
Refreshment: 8/10
So dry and crisp that it goes down a treat.
Flavour 8/10:
A good example of how a pale ale should taste, a little drier than others, but not to its detriment.
Alcohol Content: 6/10
5.4%. Indian pale ales are rumoured to have been brewed stronger, as a preservation technique in the 1700s. It's not true of course, but breweries in modern times may not know that.
Price: 8/10
$3.25 because once again, we grabbed a six pack.
Total: 37/50

Conclusion:
This will become a favorite, especially as it is available a few blocks from my work. A neat example of an IPA. It feels like a hunters beer, so serve it around a camp fire, while dining on wedge tailed eagle, Siberian tiger, and man.   
Cheers

Fat Yak Pale Ale - Australia 11-3-11

The Low Down:
I wasn't going to review this modern Australian staple, but I like reviewing and drinking beer, so here goes.

Fat Yak tastes noting like a yak, to its credit. Unfortunately I was so eager to drink it that the picture of the of the lid is slightly bent. we were at a Pizza Parlour for Friday lunch and the thrill of beer and pizza took control.

Fat Yak is hoppy. Hoppy and sweet, as if the only ingredients were water, hops and sugar. The malted barely makes an appearance. This makes it an excellent pizza beer. Especially Doughboy Pizza, who have bizarre culinary delights, like the Carbonarra.

Fat Yak is becoming a staple. Considering it was invented in a garage in Victoria, that's pretty impressive.

Packaging: 6/10
The colour scheme is OK, but I'm not a fan of the panelled fence.
Refreshment: 7/10
Quite refreshing, but the hoppiness means you can't neck this quite as quick as its competitors. A distinct lack of carbonation as well.
Flavour 8/10:
With that said, the hoppiness is delicious. Plus it's so sweet!
Alcohol Content: 5/10
4.7%. A little on the low side, but not extraordinarily so for a pale ale.
Price: 8/10
$3.30 because we grabbed a six pack. A very reasonable price
Total: 34/50

Conclusion:
Better than most beers in its price range, Fat Yak is a well engineered beer. If you like hops and sugar, drink this with your Friday pizza.
Cheers

Monteith's Summer Ale - New Zealand 10-3-11

The Low Down:
Last summer, I drank this beer every day. It is truly the greatest New Zealand beer.

With flavours of ginger, honey and citrus, it is a spectacular summer ale.

This Beer assaults the senses. It is one of my personal all time favorites. It reminds me of a long weekend in June when me and two friends travelled to Christchurch, where we wrote ourselves off, on their entire range.

Monteith's recently re-branded all of their beers, and the design is now excellent. "A fresh bright and lively beer, made with lightly kilned malt and a touch of Rata honey." When you read that, what can I say that would possibly discourage you?

Packaging: 9/10
The redesign has really worked for the brand. All their beers and ciders now look like this. It's almost perfect.
Refreshment: 10/10
Really, coming into my flat with no air-conditioning on a summers afternoon, I can think of few things I would rather pull out of the fridge.
Flavour 9/10:
So diverse, with so many subtle layers. A truly amazing beer.
Alcohol Content: 7/10
5%. Let's be honest, with all of the deliciousness they have managed to fit into this bottle, it's a wonder it has any alcohol at all.
Price: 8/10
$5.10 isn't a lot for this premium ale. Trust me when I say it's worth it.
Total: 43/50

Conclusion:
This Ale steps out of the constraints of a standard Ale, and does so with such finesse that it's hard to understand what beer tasted like before you tried Monteith's Summer Ale
Cheers.

Miller Genuine Draft - U.S.A. 10-3-11

The Import Miller was hard to track down and is the first legally imported beer I've ever found with no alcohol % on it. Since I never drink and drive, alcohol content doesn't really matter to me, but a little bit of research reveals 4.7%, making it perfectly acceptable for the lightweights out there.

Unfortunately Miller Genuine Draft doesn't do much to put aside the reputation of American beers. I've been there, I know they are better than this. If only I could get some Karl Strauss in Australia.

A generic extra hoppy lager with a bitter finish. Ambitiously marketed to the middle-upper class man, but tasting like a construction site lager without any of the character. The slight cherry nose is great, but it doesn't compensate for just how generic this seems.

Packaging: 3/10
The bottle design is like a surprise transvestite. At the top it all looks good, but as you get lower the horror show starts. An attempt to combine the styles of high society and hand crafted that simply does not work.
Refreshment: 5/10
The Fizz makes it slightly better than water. Slightly.
Flavour 3/10:
Generic, generic, generic.
Alcohol Content: 5/10
4.7%. For a mass-produced American beer, this is actually quite good.
Price: 5/10
$4.20 for an import beer, if it was delicious, I might say good value. As it stands, spend your money elsewhere.
Total: 21/50

Conclusion:
This is not the worst beer I have ever tasted, but it isn't one I would ask for, given another choice. If I needed something frosty and lubricious, there are circumstances where this beer would be acceptable, but not many.
Cheers.

Cabana Cerveza - El Salvador 10-3-11

The Low Down:
Fruity Summery goodness. Where the hell is El Salvador anyway?
After some research it turns out it's in Central America between Guatemala and Honduras, and they makes a DELICIOUS beer.

If I were on the equator in central America, this is all I would drink. These brewers really got it right. The clear bottle means it needs to be stored in the dark, but you wont be able to keep a case long enough for it to spoil.

Everything is exactly right. It tastes like a tropical dream. Pineapple, guava, paw paw, romance, this is the true flavour of Cabana.

The qualities of this special beverage? Fruity, refreshing, crisp, very light with an amazing colour.

Packaging: 5/10
OK it looks like Fisher Price beer, but it is product appropriate. This beer is fun!
Refreshment: 8/10
Alcoholic Tropical Fruit juice. With bubbles. Serve cold.
Flavour 9/10:
Tastes like a tropical dream. This is how equatorial beer NEEDS to taste.
Alcohol Content: 5/10
4.6%, on the light side, but you could easily drink 20 of them.
Price: 7/10
$4.20 for an import beer. Good value.
Total: 35/50

 Conclusion:
This beer is everything that's right with central American beer.
 It makes for the perfect excuse to propel a gilled decapod crustacean onto the methane and impure carbon powered heating device.
Cheers

Carlsberg - Denmark 10-3-11

The Low Down:
Our next venture into flavour country brings us to the Viking homeland with Carlserg Export quality. "All malt premium beer."

Malt is the right word, this beer reeks of it, but that's a good thing. it smells sweet and fruity, and goes down really smooth. There's a reason this is one of the worlds most consumed beers.

While it's not the most amazing example of Scandinavian brewing, Carlsberg is a very drinkable beer. The maltiness is almost unique, like a beer milkshake. The finish and smell are wonderful which contrasts with the locally brewed version, as it falls far short of this beer.

My only real gripe? The advertising on the bottle. Yes we know you sponsor a sports team, they wear your brand on their shirts, please leave it off your product.

Packaging: 3/10
The advertising ruins this bottle, the nicely textured glass is the only reason this scores at all.
Refreshment: 6/10
Very very malty, but still strangely refreshing.
Flavour 7/10:
Malty, which equals delicious. As a connoisseur of Scandinavian food, this is a great match.
Alcohol Content: 5/10
5%, exactly what you would expect.
Price: 7/10
$4.20 for an import beer. Pretty good value.
Total: 28/50

Conclusion:
A Fair sampling from one of the worlds biggest brewers, let down in part by advertising. Drink it with a hearty meal, at any time of the day, any day of the week.
Cheers

Singha - Thailand 10-3-11

The Low Down:
This is the first beer on this mighty adventure, and it brings back great memories of travels and adventures with friends.
Singha Premium Import Lager Beer "The original Thai Beer since 1933"
This beer is a compliment to Thailand, spicy food and summer delight. What it lacks in the complexity and flavour compared to some of its European cousins, it makes up for in refreshment, and Asian beers must be refreshing.

A little too carbonated, with a slightly bitter aftertaste, but quite thirst quenching and refreshing at the same time.

Packaging: 7/10
elegant white and gold label on a brown glass bottle (bonus points for the "by royal permission").
Refreshment: 8/10
Light crisp and cold, how an Asian beer should be.
Flavour 4/10:
nothing special here, but it doesn't taste like ass. Bonus.
Alcohol Content: 5/10
5%, not unrespectable.
Price: 8/10
At 3.50 for an import, its very respectable, buy it in Thailand for around 25 baht( <$AU1) and its incredible value.
Total: 33/50

Conclusion: serve it with something spicy on a hot day. drink it quick don't let it get warm, and you are onto a winner.
Cheers